This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You should not be offended if he wants to call it off, for he has helped you more than you have helped him. Surprisingly enough, we find such convictions no great obstacle to a spiritual experience. Still the play does not suit him. We are not saints. Seeing this, and meaning to be helpful, his wife commenced to admonish him about it. There is doubt about that. The publication of this book has not been authorized or endorsed by, and does not imply affilia-tion with Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. or the General Service Office of Alcoholics Anonymous. We want the wives of Alcoholics Anonymous to address the wives of men who drink too much. Some of us have been violently anti- religious. Perhaps it is going to be that way with you. He often says that if he had continued to work on them, he might have deprived many others, who have since recovered, of their chance. One instance comes to mind in which a malicious individual was always making friendly little jokes about an alcoholics drinking exploits. When, however, the perfectly logical assumption is suggested that underneath the material world and life as we see it, there is an All Powerful, Guiding, Creative Intelligence, right there our perverse streak comes to the surface and we laboriously set out to convince ourselves it isnt so. He had to painfully admit that and mend his spiritual fences. Flash fiction is anything from The app also contains a Sobriety Calendar where you can enter your sobriety date and see how many years/months/days you currently have. How much did these feelings, these loves, these worships, have to do with pure reason? We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. If your man accepts your offer, it should be pointed out that physical treatment is but a small part of the picture. Is he not really a self-seeker even when trying to be kind? After such an approach many take up their beds and walk again. Dirt Bike A Vendre, We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. If you and your husband find a solution for the pressing problem of drink you are, of course, going to be very happy. Scoffers could scoff and be damned. We cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of But it is clear that we made our own misery. From surrounding towns, families drive long distances to be present. If, on the contrary, you are sure he is doing his utmost, you may wish to give him another chance. Unlike the feelings of the ships passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways. Sometimes a new man is anxious to proceed at once. Still no thought of drinking. Their cost of production is figured to a fine decimal point. Let us make haste to reassure you. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition. But all problems will not be solved at once. When your prospect has made such reparation as he can to his family, and has thoroughly explained to them the new principles by which he is living, he should proceed to put those principles into action at home. Of an evening, you can go on a mild bender, get up in the morning, shake your head and go to business. We alcoholics are undisciplined. CAPITULATE: To surrender unconditionally or on stipulated terms. But one of the friends said, Put him in a private room. He will match your mental inconsistencies with some of his own. The reader may still ask why he should believe in a Power greater than himself. At a proper time and place explain to all your friends why alcohol disagrees with you. If common words were not discarded, the 164 and More book would be 4 inches thick containing 1,700 pages. When drinking, they were strangers. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. The big book, Alcoholics Anonymous, sometimes described as the A.A. bible, has three hundred references to the . The very practical approach to his problems, the absence of intolerance of any kind, the informality, the genuine democracy, the uncanny understanding which these people had were irresistible. This case contains a powerful lesson. There is scarcely any form of trouble and misery which has not been overcome among us. First of all, we had to quit playing God. Perhaps we rejected this particular conception because it seemed inadequate. The author is a founder of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), Bill W. & Dr. Bob. Inevitably your lives will be fuller for doing so. Leaving aside the drink question, they tell why living was so unsatisfactory. Affections have been uprooted. Why could they not see that drink meant ruin to them? Science tells us so. Bottles were only a symbol. They may be disgusting. This brings us to the Fifth Step in the program of recovery mentioned in the preceding chapter. We thought, on the whole, we were pretty good women, capable of being nicer if our husbands stopped drinking. There were flights from city to country and back, as my wife and I sought escape. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. Im sorry I got disturbed. Upon a foundation of complete willingness I might build what I saw in my friend. There is a good bit of travel between East and West and we foresee a great increase in this helpful interchange. Where were we at fault, what should we have done instead? After all, are you not looking for results rather than methods? We stick to our own. The experience of any alcoholic will abundantly confirm this. It meant destruction of self-centeredness. We made a list of people I had hurt or toward whom I felt resentment. 69 SEX - We asked God to mold our ideals and help us live up to them. It displays the text of the first 164 pages of the book "Alcoholics Anonymous." (Click here to read them). Where had we been selfish, dishonest, self- seeking and frightened? Use your energies to promote a better understanding all around. I simply didnt know. When possible, avoid meeting a man through his family. Plenty of difficulties presented themselves. We reviewed our fears thoroughly. He had come to pass his experience along to me-if I cared to have it. The inviting maelstrom of Wall Street had me in its grip. That is true only if one is willing to turn the past to good account. My weary and despairing wife was informed that it would all end with heart failure during delirium tremens, or I would develop a wet brain, perhaps within a year. Get an idea of his behavior, his problems, his background, the seriousness of his condition, and his religious leanings. How many pages is the AA Big Book? 151-164) PERSONAL STORIES. It was years since I could remember his coming to New York in that condition. Perhaps he will never have much money again. The 164 and More web site. If the family cooperates, dad will soon see that he is suffering from a distortion of values. But, for the most part, the original text . While on the subject of confidence, can you adopt the attitude that so far as you are concerned this will be a strictly personal matter, that his alcoholic derelictions, the treatment about to be undertaken, will never be discussed without his consent? how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book . They cannot seem to forgive and forget. He might be shocked if he knew how much alcoholism is costing his organization a year. will add more attitude to your Bagger than a . He looked straight at me. It was fun to carom around the exclusive course which had inspired such awe in me as a lad. Im ready to do business. I know little of where I went or what I said and did. Show him these things in yourself and they will be reflected back to you from him. He tries every known means to get the jay-walking idea out of his head. He has helped other men recover, and is a power in the church from which he was long absent. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding companionship and approval. Your new courage, good nature and lack of self-consciousness will do wonders for you socially. how many electrolyzers per hydrogen generator; 5-letter words containing g l a s; teach your child the word of god bible verse. That didnt seem to bother me so I tried another.. We put them on paper, even though we had no resentment in connection with them. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. Of course he couldnt drink, but why not sit hopefully at a table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums-we could increase the list ad infinitum. Alcohol is so sexually stimulating to some men that they have over-indulged. Father may have laid aside for years all normal activities- clubs, civic duties, sports. Those of us belonging to a religious denomination which requires confession must, and of course, will want to go to the properly appointed authority whose duty it is to receive it. He is striving to recover fortune and reputation and feels he is doing very well. You may be aiding in his destruction rather than his recovery. Two: Your husband is showing lack of control, for he is unable to stay on the water wagon even when he wants to. Its water over the dam. We think of their needs and work for them. Many an alcoholic who entered there came away with an answer. They will always materialize if we work for them. If a repetition is to be prevented, place the problem, along with everything else, in Gods hands. 1,618 ratings63 reviews. If you ask him why he started on that last bender, the chances are he will offer you any one of a hundred alibis. Show him, from your own experience, how the queer mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power. Little by little the family may see their own defects and admit them. We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. We think the business fabric is shot through with a situation which might be helped by better understanding all around. Have we tried to make mortar without sand? Whom had we hurt? We, who have been through the wringer, have to admit if we substituted alcoholism for jay-walking, the illustration would fit us exactly. You, as well as your husband, ought to think of what you can put into life instead of how much you can take out. The 164 and More Book, eBook, and Web Site are all CONCORDANCES which display passages from the Big Book Alcoholics Anonymous, the Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and the A.A. Grapevine (A.A. Preamble only). We were reborn. Whether he dieth by musket We had to have Gods help. Some drinkers have excuses with which they are satisfied part of the time. I pushed a drink across the table. He will work like the devil and thank you to his dying day. If you take it, your past will be forgotten and the fact that you went away for treatment will not be mentioned. Wed hardly be human if we didnt. We, who are familiar with the symptoms, see large numbers of potential alcoholics among young people everywhere. Who wouldnt be, with such a fevered brain? In this book you read again and again that faith did for us what we could not do for ourselves. 40 When was the Second edition of the Big Book introduced? In a matter of fact way he told how two men had appeared in court, persuading the judge to suspend his commitment. We are greatly indebted to the doctor in attendance there, for he, although it might prejudice his own work, has told us of his belief in ours. He had felt only the first nip of the wringer. We told him what we knew of alcoholism and the answer we had found. Then, in days, weeks, or months, a fresh outburst. Now these are commonplace observations on drinkers which we hear all the time. Well, just that did happen and more, for what I had learned of alcoholism did not occur to me at all. Still another difficulty is that you may become jealous of the attention he bestows on other people, especially alcoholics. 16; For a moment I was alarmed, and called my friend, the doctor, to ask if I were still sane. of the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous, be developed and a progress repOii be brought to the 1998 Conference Literature Committee." We had a new Employer. She was furious. If he cannot or does not want to stop, he should be discharged. If we cannot or would rather not do this, we search our acquaintance for a close-mouthed, understanding friend. If the owner of the business is to be successful, he cannot fool himself about values. Imagine life without faith! Coming to his senses, he is revolted at certain episodes he vaguely remembers. In a few years he became so violent when intoxicated that he had to be committed. Referencing these four preceding chapters Answer (1 of 3): That would be a fairly short book. It began to look as though religious people were right after all. * This refers to Bills first visit with Dr. Bob. This is sometimes a mistake. Printed in 2 BIG volumes, the 1987 Buick Chassis Service Manuals contained all of the . First Edition of the Big Book. You can see that he really does love you with his better self. We hope no one will consider these self-revealing accounts in bad taste. Whatever our protestations, are not most of us concerned with ourselves, our resentments, or our self-pity? He made a beginning. In many homes this is a difficult thing to do, but it must be done if any results are to be expected. This PDF file is an Easy-Read Large Print Ebook created in 2009 by major1212 -at-pobox.com. To us it is not far- fetched, for this kind of thinking has been characteristic of every single one of us. Since the first edition appeared, in 1939, it has helped millions of men and women recover from alcoholism. Is it not evident to all the rest of the players that these are the things he wants? Then I decided to drive into the country and see one of my prospects for a car. Since we can't read all four chapters tonight, 10 pages on powerlessness are selected from The Doctors Opinion, Bills Story, More About Alcoholism, and There is a Solution. We often need it to carry green recruits through a severe hangover Some of us still serve it to our friends provided they are not alcoholic. Instead, the problem has been removed. Under these conditions we naturally made mistakes. As a celebrated American statesman put it, Lets look at the record.. But life was not easy for the two friends. Their chances are less than average. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously anti-social. Let him see that you want to be helpful rather than critical. Nearly every modern employer feels a moral responsibility for the well-being of his help, and he tries to meet these responsibilities. If a sufficiently strong reason-ill health, falling in love, change of environment, or the warning of a doctor- becomes operative, this man can also stop or moderate, although he may find it difficult and troublesome and may even need medical attention. This process snuffed out the last flicker of conviction that I could do the job myself. Therefore, we started upon a personal inventory. I had always believed in a Power greater than myself. You can select the following fonts: Arial, Calibri, Comic sans MS, Courier New, Times New Roman and Verdana. It is dependent upon his relationship with God. Pg. With publication of the second edition in 1955, the third edition in 1976, Gin would fix that. Social distinctions, petty rivalries and jealousies-these are laughed out of countenance. And with us, to drink is to die. We have prayed, we have begged, we have been patient. Instead of regarding ourselves as intelligent agents, spearheads of Gods ever advancing Creation, we agnostics and atheists chose to believe that our human intelligence was the last word, the alpha and the omega, the beginning and end of all. I thought of my poor wife. If what we have learned and felt and seen means anything at all, it means that all of us, whatever our race, creed, or color are the children of a living Creator with whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try. That war-time day in old Winchester Cathedral came back again. He listened in wonder as I talked. You might say you appreciate his abilities, would like to keep him, but cannot if he continues to drink. It depends on us and on our motives. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. As you type, words are displayed which match your keystrokes. We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. You are sure to find someone desperate enough to accept with eagerness what you offer. This hope, however, was destroyed by the doctors telling him that while his religious convictions were very good, in his case they did not spell the necessary vital spiritual experience. We never apologize for God. The title page says it all. In fact, I have been trying to produce some such emotional rearrangement within you. I was to right all such matters to the utmost of my ability. We have sometimes reflected more than Jim did upon the consequences. The First 164 pages of The Big Book with lined pages opposite text for note taking. The family is mystified. His friends feel closer over a highball. It went into certain securities, then cheap and rather unpopular. Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. He often gets entirely out of hand when drinking. Stepping into his car, he made the rounds of people he had hurt. Life will mean something at last. It brings misunderstanding, fierce resentment, financial insecurity, disgusted friends and employers, warped lives of blameless children, sad wives and parents- anyone can increase the list. Then that terrible tension which grips the home of every problem drinker will be lessened. Some of the contemporaries of Columbus thought a round earth preposterous. Let us have a look at some of them. Id prove to the world I was important. But one of the friends said, "Put him in a private room. A certain American business man had ability, good sense, and high character. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. Some of them may sink and perhaps never get up, but if our experience is a criterion, more than half of those approached will become fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Unless the reason is understood, there may be an emotional upset. What a state of mental goose-flesh that used to bring on! We thought we could find an easier, softer way. If our manner is calm, frank, and open, we will be gratified with the result. If we have been thorough about our personal inventory, we have written down a lot. How can such a lack of proportion, of the ability to think straight, be called anything else? I was finished and so were many friends. If he is already committed to an institution, but can convince you and your doctor that he means business, give him a chance to try our method, unless the doctor thinks his mental condition too abnormal or dangerous. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of Gods will into all of our activities. Try to drink and stop abruptly. That statement hit me hard. That being so you have swallowed and digested some big chunks of truth about yourself. Do not ask that he do it for you or anyone else. Never was I to pray for myself, except as my requests bore on my usefulness to others. Why We Created This Tool. Treat him, when you can, as though he had pneumonia. Attempt instead, to put yourself in his place. They have solved the drink problem. As we shall see, he now means a great deal to his community, and the major liabilities of thirty years of hard drinking have been repaired in four. Under these conditions we can employ our mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. The 164 and More web site. A man so involved often feels very remorseful at times, especially if he is married to a loyal and courageous girl who has literally gone through hell for him. This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. The experiment of quitting for a period of time will be helpful, but we think we can render an even greater service to alcoholic sufferers and perhaps to the medical fraternity. Bom Jesus dos Perdes, Bragana Paulista, Cabreva, Caieiras, Cajamar, Campo Limpo Paulista, The first impulse will be to bury these skeletons in a dark closet and padlock the door. God didnt do it. For a time he may try to hug the new treasure to himself. Both father and the family are mistaken, though each side may have some justification. I woke up. But this man still lives, and is a free man. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him. The wife should fully understand his new way of life. The text and page numbers are the same in both the 3rd edition and 4th edition of The Big Book. how many words are in the first 164 pages of the big book. Students of ancient history tell us that the intellect of men in those days was equal to the best of today. We know that no real alcoholic ever recovers control. Dont start to withdraw again just because your friends drink liquor. Admitting he may be somewhat at fault, he is sure that other people are more to blame. The wars which had been fought, the burnings and chicanery that religious dispute had facilitated, made me sick. It's a way of life. Cleaning up old scrapes, helping to settle family differences, explaining the disinherited son to his irate parents, lending money and securing jobs for each other, when justified-these are everyday occurrences. He is very much the actor. Perhaps our doctor or psychologist will be the person. These give a fair cross section of our membership and a clear-cut idea of what has actually happened in their lives. It may be slowing him up mentally and physically, but he does not see it. The Little Big Book avoids sexist language, and welcomes people of all lifestyles and faiths. There was something about his eyes. The matter of physical treatment should, of course, be referred to your own doctor. Doubtless you are curious to discover how and why, in the face of expert opinion to the contrary, we have recovered from a hopeless condition of mind and body. Some of us have tried to hold on to our old ideas and the result was nil until we let go absolutely. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. It hadnt even come to mind. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else. These 164 pages are in the Public Domain Alcoholics Anonymous Screen 6 of 703 Whats in the AA Big Book? He too, has become a respected and useful member of his community. Simply because it is impossible to explain what we see, feel, direct, and use, without a reasonable assumption as a starting point. The minute we put our work on a service plane, the alcoholic commences to rely upon our assistance rather than upon God. They need your companionship and your help. We were bothered with the thought that faith and dependence upon a Power beyond ourselves was somewhat weak, even cowardly. Preface / Forward to the 1st Edition. Download it once and read it on your Kindle device, PC, phones or tablets. In two months he was in a hospital, puzzled and humiliated. My writhing nerves were stilled at last. We, who have collectively seen a great deal of business life, at least from the alcoholic angle, had to smile at this gentlemans sincere opinion. 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